So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
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