Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize