Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
