just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
