The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
