ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
