Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
