Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
