so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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