just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
