PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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