he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
