it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
