Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
