I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
We're not piercing ourselves today.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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