Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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