garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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