Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize