I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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