Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
