I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize