i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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