The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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