You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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