I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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