what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
