I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
