Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
