3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I don't think brook has ever known best
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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