It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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