11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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