Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
