The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Randomize
