this beer tastes like vomit already
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize
