I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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