it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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