That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize