Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize