Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I AM VODKA MAN
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
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