I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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