you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Randomize
