1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
