The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Let's get the cat blown out
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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