it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Randomize
