no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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