I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
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