IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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