we have pet lesbian snakes
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
