I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
