He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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