But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
