i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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